The final follow-up to the Halloween saga

well, I did think it was over, but nope, not quite. I thought a call from the principal would be enough. Apparently I was wrong because the next morning I got this.

You are going overboard with your attitude. Mary Goodson has already taken the game on. I said if you wanted to send in treats that is fine. Donuts are great. What seems to be the problem? I know about Dorothy and her allergies. I EMAILED ONLY TO MAKE SURE I HAD EVERYTHING UNDER CONTROL.. I have already talked to Annette and sent her an email yesterday morning.

You have blown this way out of proportion.

Such compassion! I replied…

But you didn’t. The doughnuts were unsafe, you said from the get go that they were unsafe and you knew she couldn’t have them. Do you not understand that just touching something can kill my daughter? Do you know what it is like to watch your child almost die and have epinephrine be the only thing that can save her life and that not be a guarantee? The party is supposed to be 100% safe for her, it was not. I offered solutions not critisism. When you fear sending your child to a party because someone doesn’t understand her disability, talk to me about going over board. Until then, I feel harrassed by your aggressive attitudte towards me. I’m sorry you can’t control the food, this is WHY WE HAVE A 504 PLAN. IT IS A DISABILITY. IT ISN’T ENOUGH TO MAKE HER SOMETHING DIFFERENT IT NEEDS TO BE THE SAME FOR THIS PARTY.

Email my husband in regards to what actually will be served other than the doughnuts.

Of course, she ignored my request that she send further communication to John. I’ll take a moment here to say that our school is NOT tree nut free, only Dorothy’s classroom and classroom parties – this is outlined in her 504, school functions do not have to be nut free.

I said that I was getting them from IGA. I have always gotten them from IGA, For the Grandparents Breakfast, for the Dad’s breakfast. I did not know about IGA. That is why I emailed you first RIGHT!!!!

I was checking with you……….

followed by this changed attitude email…again, to me…I never did respond to her.


I am done with this. If you want to bring the donuts, please do. Mary Goodson said she would take care of the game, I am reading a storie. If you want to put the craft together for the kids, I can drop the supplies off at your house.

This is a party for the kids and this is absolutely ridiculious. I have never had any problems like this before since I have been involved in these things and I have a 19 year old and I refuse to go through anything like this again. I just emailed you to make sure that Dorothy was going to be able to have a safe party just like everyone else. These conversations got out of control. I am sorry.

Let me know if you want to put the craft together.

I told John she could take her craft and shove it up her ass.

Our principal got more involved and sent this.

It seems as if there are some hurt feelings among the two of you and I want to see if I can help a little. You are both caring mothers that just want the best for your children and the other children in class.

This is where I think we are:
Mrs. Bitch is planning the party in terms of activities, games, etc. We certainly appreciate this.
Mrs. Tara does not wish to plan the party. She just needs to approve the food items. This is something that is written into a special plan developed for her child because of her allergies.

How about this…Bitch please send me a list of the food you are thinking of serving and putting in treat bags (it might help if they are chosen from the list Mrs. Tara provided). Then I will check to make sure that everyone in the class can eat these items.

If donuts are still in the plan, they do need to come from a nut free bakery and Mrs. Tara can pick them up. I see this as the extent of her role in this party.

Perhaps instead of contacting each other, I can be the go between on this matter. My hopes are that we can resolve this as a group before the Winter Party.

I’ll consider that good.

Thank you all for your positive thoughts on this and for your concern about my daughter! I wish she could be surrounded with such wonderful people all the time!


2 thoughts on “The final follow-up to the Halloween saga

  1. Good for you, Tara. I mean, Mrs. Bitch is acting like D is a vegetarian or something, and she can just provide a vegetarian choice for her to make her happy. I hope Mrs. Bitch can put herself in your shoes, even if only for a moment, to realize that D is only safe at home and in her classroom. I am so sorry that your little girl will have to deal with this kind of stupidity her entire life.

  2. Thanks Carmen 🙂 Thankfully, most people go out of their way to help make sure that she is safe. As she gets older it will be up to her to help educate people, and she’ll have to remain vigilant for her lifetime checking ingredient labels and asking questions. My hope is that through education people will be more accepting and tollerant, but she will likely find more people like this woman, and I am sorry for that. If I could, I’d make all stupidity go away, but sadly I cannot.

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